I would never have found out what I could have been or what I should be . I was just walking my dog, although the heat is intense today and it was a struggle, I, along with Roxy did enjoy the birds as she is fascinated with them and airplanes. Anything with movement she is in awe of. She loves the butterflies and even the bumble bees. When she nears the bees I just say "nasty" and she quickly goes on to bigger and better things. She has taught me to enjoy and notice the beauty we have, even in our backyard. It was so hot, yet the feel of the outside was wonderful and the slow pace of walking and watching her enjoy this wonderful creation that only God could have made was worth the few beads of sweat.
I also thought how much I have enjoyed my computer over the years and my recently started blog. I thought that if only I had enjoyed school and college and had been as dedicated and spent the time with it as I have and do with my computer, I could have been somebody. Anything I wanted to have been when I finished high school was in my reach. I had the same opportunity as my brother; as we both had full scholarships to any state college in North Carolina through the VA since our dad was killed in service. Thankfully and fortunately, my brother did just that and got his degree from NC State University in Raleigh. He went to work and recently retired after 41 years of service with the company he started with fresh out of college. Oh, I went to college. I went to Appalachian which was a teacher's college. There was no way I wanted to be a teacher! So for two years I pretended, then I quit. My brother literally took me and enrolled me in a business college in Charlotte. All the opportunities were there too, but they really didn't thrill me. I guess that was the most fun I have ever had in one year! I of course played on the basketball team, hung out at Spoon's Ice Cream, Hawthorne Center and met what I thought was the love of my life. That too failed. The highlight of my year there was getting to play a ball game in Park Center, which in the 60's was quite a big thing!
Whatever you do, you must apply yourself and I have sure done my share of applying myself with this computer, but although limited on what I am able to do physically, as far as house work, I have not applied myself enough and I have let the computer control me vs me controlling the computer. I told my husband that I needed to do this or that, but I know my angina will kick in, but if I do it and I have an attack, I can at least know I tried. That is what is known as soothing your conscience.
I am finishing with this note. Although I did not succeed as far as education, I did well with my family. My husband and both sons are college graduates, so they give me all the help I could possibly need. Thrown in with lots of LOVE!